My childish sense of mischief has been working overtime to conjure up ideas for pranks and funny things to do as my last working day approaches (Friday July 28, 2006)I've taken a page from Jim in The Office and had a few suggestions/ideas already:
- Take an object from someone's desk and put it in a jello mold...then leave it for them to find
- Replacing someone's pens and pencils with crayons
- Have a garage sale for left over office supplies I won't need at my desk
- Buy my old telephone off the company so that I can ceremoniously take a sledge hammer to it in a deserted field...then melt it in a bon fire. "Try and ring NOW...b#%ch..."
- Chasing a solicitor out with a baseball bat
- Squirting a solicitor with a water gun (I just thought of that...oh MAN I would die laughing...)
- Make out with someone on my desk (whoops...that was supposed to go under "secret fantasies"...wrong list...)
- Moon the security camera
- Print off a page that says "I have felt for a long time that my needs as a printer have been neglected. People just come and go in and out of my life all the time and use me for my ink supply. I have feelings too! And I hope the rumours about replacing me haven't been true...I always try to do my best and I'm sorry about the paper jams. Some days I'm just not feeling up to par. Please try to understand and be a little more sensitive in future. Love, Herbert (your printer...yes, I do have a name. Didn't bother to find out did ya?" and just wait for someone to pick it up at the printer
- Convince people that I'm leaving to star in a movie and they should get my autograph while they can
- Try to mail my most annoying coworker to Japan
- Put a sign on my boss's back
- Put up a "donations to the Lorraine fund" box
- Build a monument to myself in reception.
- Plant a fake huge rubber spider in a common area of the office
- Page for Donald Duck or some other humorous cartoon character
- Switch the male and female symbols on the bathrooms
- Put a fake porn icon on my desktop, take a print screen of the desk top, set it as the background, delete the porn icon, but it will still appear as a picture...this should make the person who tries to delete it go nuts because they won't be able to
Clearly this list is not nearly long enough, so please leave me comments with more suggestions!
Thanks.
Love, Herbert.
2 comments:
-Wear a sparkly sash that says "Mrs. So-The-Eff-Outtahere.
-release doves.
-Use multicoloured Post It's to mumify a few "lucky" co-workers and play "Guess the mumified generic office worker" for prizes. (prizes=Post It's)
-Ride a decorative elephant into the sunset upon final exit. If too early...towards...nah wait for the sunset. That would be so awesome.
-Distribute "What I Really Should Have Said on the Phone" manifesto. Everyone needs a good manifesto now and again.
-Cake. That is all.
As small as this is, it's still funny to do if you're leaving or staying. Rearrange someone's office - in part or in whole - so the things they always keep in one place have been moved to another. Reverse their office. I did this once. It was quite humourous. Then again, I'm a moron so most things are funny to me.
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