Goin' Postal

So I had to go to the post office today for work. As I’m standing in line with my arm load of heavy parcels, I glance around and take in my surroundings, as one usually does when they are waiting for something. I notice there is a cart in the aisle between the two mail outlets. The cart has a bin full of boxes in it. One box is smaller than the rest and is sitting upon a bigger box. The guy infront of me, who is next in line, all of a sudden walks up to said box, and tries putting it in elsewhere in the bin to fit it in.
Now my first impression here is, ok, this guy must work for the post office and I only thought he was standing in line. No, sure enough, when it is his turn, he goes up and mails his parcel like everybody else. Now, this wasn’t just helpfully placing a fallen box back where it belongs…this was full out out trying to jam the damn thing in the bin whether it wanted to fit or not.
Does this strike anybody else as odd?? Could he not be charged with tampering with mail?? Who takes it upon themselves to do something like that?? I thought I was the only one obsessive compulsive enough to have to move something so that it fits nicely in place!

"This is my fake phone voice. How may I direct your call?"

I work right now as a receptionist. As such, certain perks and quirks come with the job. For example, when my daily FedEx courier showed up 45 minutes after we closed, I wrote a strongly worded email and received a free gift basket with lots of chocolate. When Staples messed up my order, they sent me a luggage set. When telemarketers call, I get to mess with their heads. “No I’m sorry…she killed herself…it was because she couldn’t find a good office supplies company…if only you had called sooner…”

I also notice quirky things that many other people wouldn’t notice unless you were in my job. Most of these things drive me nuts. For example, when solicitors walk past not one, but TWO “No Soliciting” signs to my desk and ask to speak to the person in charge of…blah blah blah. As soon as you hear “the person in charge of” you know they have no right to be there. One I’ve been noticing lately is how oddly people speak when they phone somebody.

"Good afternoon, Labcoat Technologies?"

• “May I please speak to the employee Bob Freeman?”
  I'm just curious really…did you REALLY need to specify “the employee”? Who did you think I was going to transfer you to? The elephant Bob Freeman?? The non-employee Bob Freeman??
  
• "Yes, hi, how are you *no pause*, yes, may I please speak to…*shuffling of papers* ummm let’s see here….uhhh…..”
  Good idea to know who you are calling BEFORE you pick up the phone.
  
• "Hi yes, I was wondering if I may have the extension of Mr. Kerry Anderson, I believe his extension is…235?”
  Ok…first of all…I can’t GIVE you the extension, that would require you physically being here. Second of all, I work in a small company and know every extension off by heart…you really don’t have to give me a name AND the extension…but thanks for trying to help me out with my job.
  
• "Hi, how are you today??”
  9 times out of 10, it is a telemarketer. Revert to “I don’t speak english” mode.

HOLY CRAP MY STAPLER JUST MOVED BY ITSELF…I SWEAR IT DID…maybe I should finish my work.

In conclusion, if you are calling a business, A) always know the name of the person you are calling BEFORE you call them and B) say please and thank you. I usually wait a half second before transferring to see if there is a thank you after I say “Yes, one moment please”. C) If you can’t pronounce a hard to pronounce last name, don’t try to sound it out and butcher it…D) Ok I lied, there isn’t a D.

If you are a telemarketer reading this, die in hell.

That is all.

Sugar We're Goin' Down

Usually Fridays are highly enjoyable. I do little work because all my important tasks for the week are done. Also, creepy HR guy isn’t in Fridays. That reason alone is enough to boost my spirits for the rest of the weekend. But…(sigh). Today hasn’t been that great. It’s grey and cold out, as we are no doubt descending into a typical Canadian winter. And…I just found out some stuff that put quite a damper on my spirits. I hate finding out dissappointing things!! It sucks like…like…a vacuum! Argh, I’m not funny either…

So I’m thinking of organizing one of my boycotts on life. Life can’t win if you don’t give it the satisfaction! I just won’t participate! You can’t lose if you’re not playing…although I’m sure that really is just losing in another form.
Anywho, no more depressing blogging…back to the grindstone.

Blog...that's a funny word

Well well well...it's seems I've been converted into the blogging cult...personally, I blame Darren, Larissa, Dave, and Laura for this. It's just like euchre...for so long I refused to learn how to play. All I could see was those learing faces looking at me with dead empty eyes saying in zombie-like monotone voices "Euchre...play euchure...come join us...JOIN US!!!"

Ok so that might be a slight exaggeration.

The point is, I've joined the blogging epidemic...here I am, with my thoughts (or lack thereof) and possibly feelings. I wonder what crazy adventures this road will bring me down...or if I will get bored of this as soon as I finish this post and let this be the first and last post on this website...