Spring Cleaning

You know it's time to clean your room when...

• your mom starts taping signs that say "danger - enter at your own risk" on your door
• the pile of clothes on the ground is so high it's become an extension of your bed
• you have run out of clothes from your closet and just pick something out from the floor to get dressed. You also start losing track of what is clean and what needs to go in the hamper all of four feet away.
• you notice the Christmas gift on your bookshelf that you have still forgotten to give to your friend
• your mom always has to close your door so she doesn't see the mess and have a nervous breakdown
• you have to beat away objects and make a path to your door like an explorer with a machete traveling through the jungle
• there are too many towels on the ground and in the dark you can't distinguish them from your terrycloth house coat
• you realize that there have been three empty water bottles sitting on your shelf for the past six months and you have no idea why you kept them
• you forget the colour of your carpet
• you use the shelves of your closet to hang your clothes on because you are too lazy to hang them on the rack
  
• you've gained more than three bruises by tripping over things in the dark
• it takes any amount of force to open your bedroom door
• you start finding receipts from 2005
• clothes and various objects have overflowed into the hallway
  
• when you go to sleep, you worry about not waking up...because a stack of something could fall on you
• you wonder how many years of your life you will uncover the closer you get to the floor of your room
• you lose one little thing and you know the only way you are going to find it is by cleaning your entire room and finding it in the last place you get to