Ketchup Love

*Conversation over a breakfast sandwhich at Tim Hortons. With ketchup.*

Nikki: Why do you love ketchup so much?

Lorraine:...why do you love your BOYFRIEND so much??

Nikki: Because...he's pretty amazing.

Lorraine: Yeah, well, so is ketchup.

More Blonde Moments With Nikki

Via msn:

Me: Don't let me forget, I have to fast tomorrow.

Nikki: Why??

Me: I have to get some blood work done on my lunch hour and I have to fast twelve hours before.

Nikki: Oh. You're going on your lunch?

Me: Yeah, it's at 12:40.

Nikki: Oh.

Me: So yeah, I can't eat past midnight tonight.

Nikki: Ah...I was trying to figure it out. I was counting on my fingers and everything.

Me: Umm...if you add or subtract twelve hours to a time, it's still the same number...3 a.m. plus twelve hours is 3 p.m...

Nikki: ...leave me alone!

Vacationers Beware...

...or you may come back to work and find your office decked out like one of these! Below are authentic pictures of offices from my work that have been decorated while their occupant was away on vacation.  Please note the careful attention to detail.

I wonder how many rolls of tin foil that took? It reminds me of that episode of Mr. Bean when he decides to paint and wraps his entire apartment in newspaper so he can light a stick of dynamite in a paint can. I wish I'd remembered that before I painted my living room.

 

Office camping!! Also handy if you work late and need to stay at work overnight.

The stuffed bear covered while the director was on vacation. According to the paw prints, he can defy gravity. Now that's a bear you want in charge.

Maxipads. Why? I have no idea. Also, I have no idea about the mouse or rat on the screen.

I've saved the best for last. There are a few impressive things here. Somehow (I have NO idea how) they got a real tub and toilet in the office, but not before first laying down the tile.

Michelle enjoys her newly decorated office, complete with toilet paper.  Hopefully she has hand sanitizer handy.

Giving Up On Comedy

*the following conversation takes place via msn between the hours of 11:00 p.m. and 12:00 a.m. Events are in real time. tick. tick. tick. tick.*

Jamie: Anyway, I need to get to bed and it sounds like you do too.

Me: Yeah, I totally do. But before you go, you have to admit my joke was pretty funny, right...right??

Jamie: What joke??  Wait, there was a joke?

Me: That's quite possibly the most disheartening response I have ever gotten to that question.